Hi guys and welcome back! This wedding post was going to be more about the proposal itself, but I thought it would be more important to talk about my relationship with Dan, as well as another important issue that I’ve mentioned before- mental health. I’ve rewritten this post about four times making sure I was being transparent, but also going back and editing things out of fear, but I reminded myself that I promised relatable and truthful content to you guys. That’s what you all deserve.
Dan and I have been together for over 4 years, but have known each other for 6 years since we met sophomore year in college. Two of those four and some years were actually long distance, making trips back and forth between North Carolina, Ohio, and New York. When I moved down to Charlotte in 2016, it was the best and worst year in our relationship. We were adapting to living together, I was home-sick, and we hadn’t spent over a week together in two years! Through all of this, it’s worth knowing I’ll be marrying the man that has supported, fought, and loved me through some of my hardest and darkest times. While raising me higher, building me even stronger, and loving me harder at my best times. (I know mushy, but I mean it!)
Now our journey has been anything but smooth. Just like any relationship, we worked through trust issues, past burdens, future aspirations, and priorities. We challenged and continue to challenge each other on personal opinions, career decisions, our goals and more. Most importantly, we struggled to understand each other mentally and emotionally. It takes a lot to understand how someone thinks and feels, which we have worked so hard to communicate and share with one another to learn.
With that said, this week has not been an easy one unfortunately for me. I have probably cried more than five times for a multitude of things…and yes I’m aware it’s only Wednesday. For seeing my family on Facebook and feeling like I’m missing out. For losing some unsaved pictures and items on my computer. For the fear I have of my upcoming genetics tests. For just feeling alone and stagnant. I can’t explain every overwhelming moment and how in less than two seconds I found myself crying hysterically. What I can explain is the love and light that wrapped around me once Dan caught me in the moment or I talked about it with him after.
This post was important for me to write because I think it’s so important to praise your partner. To thank them for what they give you every day that’s intangible. Dan is my person. He is why I am comfortable sharing my struggles. When I am at my lowest, he will bring me to the highest point of happiness. He is the man I will spend the rest of my life with and I couldn’t be luckier because I found a person willing to invest in me just as much as I invest in him. We are partners, we are equal, and we do not judge. We lift, support, laugh, love, and most importantly listen to each other.
We are still a work in progress because individually we still are as well. Embrace this because life is ever-changing and I hope we are still like this at 50 because that will mean that we have never just settled. I urge each of you to find that person. It doesn’t need to be a significant other. I truly believe everyone needs at least one person to go to that will understand that their feelings are valid and although they may not be able to describe them, they still support you. You are not mentally unstable, you just work through things differently. I got lucky and found mine at 19, but it was an acquired adjustment. I also wish for all of you to find a supportive significant other in life at some point, so that you have a consistent listener. Everyone deserves to break down once in awhile and have someone else help put you back together, especially in the comfort of your home you’re building. I do not find that to be weakness, I fully believe that it takes strength to do such. It takes strength to struggle, be vulnerable and ask for support or help.
Mental health should never be ignored. That is why I am so grateful to have a future husband that believes in its importance just as much as I do. A man that when down, does not blink an eye when I shower him with love just as he would me. This post may not have been a wedding update, story, or list. But it was a post dedicated to the true reason for even having a wedding…because I have found my person that makes me better, wiser, funnier (although he doesn’t agree), and stronger- in every facet of my being.
If you made it through this, I thank you for letting me pour my heart out today. Thank you for letting me share my appreciation for this wonderful man. For allowing me to express one of the biggest reasons I wake up everyday and love him more. Why it was so easy to say yes when he asked for my hand in marriage. And for being able to be open and honest talking about my mental health. I hope you all find calm, patience, and strength in someone as I have because I sure have needed him this week. As always, thank you for stopping by and I’ll see you next time!